If You Stay by Courtney Cole

This book was recommended to me by several people and I can say in all honesty that I am glad I got to read it, it was such an inspirational book that by the end I was overwhelmed with many emotions that I couldn't decipher which one was more prominent. 

This book had every emotion under the sun and you come out the other side in tears, whether they are good tears or bad depends on you...

Description:

He’s a tattooed, rock-hard bad-boy with a bad attitude to match.

But he’s got his reasons.His mother died when Pax was seven, leaving a hole in his heart filled with guilt although he doesn’t understand why. What he does know is that he and his dad are left alone and with more issues than they can count.As Pax grew up, he tried to be the kid his father always wanted; the perfect golden boy, but it didn’t work. His dad couldn’t overcome his grief long enough to notice and Pax couldn’t keep up the impossible perfect façade.So he slipped far, far from it.Now, he uses drugs and women to cope with the ugliness, the black void that he doesn’t want to deal with. If he pretends that the emptiness isn’t there, then it isn’t, right?Wrong.And it’s never more apparent than when he meets Mila.Sweet, beautiful Mila Hill is the fresh air to his hardened frown, the beauty to his ugly heart. He doesn’t know how to not hurt her, but he quickly realizes that he’s got to figure it out because he needs her to breathe.When memories of his mother’s death resurface from where he’s repressed them for so long, Mila is there to catch him when the guilt starts making sense. Mila is the one…the one who can save him from his broken troubled heart; from his issues, from the emptiness.But only if he can stop being an asshole long enough to allow it.He knows that. And he’s working on it.But is that enough to make her stay?

My Thoughts:

This book starts off so dramatically that I had no idea where it was going to go or how it was going to keep my interest after the most dramatic start of a book, I have ever read. 

But if I thought I saw the last of the drama I was sorely mistaken.

In the beginning, Pax is in his car in a rather promiscuous position with his booty call of the night doing lines of coke. While doing this said coke he overdoses and this is when Mila comes into the picture. She sees Pax in his car unresponsive and not breathing, she eventually gets his heart started again and then the paramedics show up and escorts him to the hospital. 

After Pax becomes lucid he finds out that Mila saved his life and comes face to face with her at the hospital when she stops by to check to make sure he was still alive.

Pax is immediately enamored with her but he can't figure out why.. Yes, she did save his life but why was she standing out in his mind more than any other woman ever has?? 

Mila thought Pax was beautiful, with his tattoos and masculine body but there was something else in him that she was attracted too and she couldn't explain it either. Save for the near death experience this guy seemed genuine and confident so she could not figure out why he would turn to drugs. 

Although, she sees the confident man on the outside she still sees the sadness and vulnerability in his eyes that tears at her heart. 

After Pax is discharged from the hospital he starts finding ways to get Mila's attention because he just HAS to know her. Mila tries to keep her distance because if one thing she knew it was bad boys were a very bad idea for her heart. 

“No.  I can’t let you break my heart.  I don’t have much of it left.”

 (p. 114)

When Pax finally persuades her to be with him, you see the beautifully broken people become a beautifullyUNbroken love. 

They make so much sense, they are perfect for each other, even if they are not perfect by themselves.

Of course even perfect relationships have their downfalls. Pax finally uncovers the truth of his mother's death and it tears at your heart and soul to see through the eyes of the little boy who had to live through that. 

Pax becomes closed off and Mila can't even reach him.

What happens when the one thing Pax swears to do, try not to hurt Mila, happens and she leaves?

This book was so emotionally raw and covered everything from drug abuse, to suppressed memories and everything in between that pulls you in from the very beginning to the very end. 

I give this book a 4/5 stars and recommend it to anyone and everyone.. 

Quotes from the book:

“You must be talented.  Sometimes, the past doesn’t want to sleep.” “That’s true,” I admit.  “You’re right.  Sometimes, at the least opportune times, the past is an insomniac, alive and well.”

 (p. 47) Kindle Edition. 

“Love never fails, Mila. That’s what your parents believed.  And because of you, it’s what I believe now, too.  You stuck by me and loved me when I didn’t deserve it.  All I want is a chance to prove that I can be worthy of it.  Your parents were sort of fucked up in their own way, like me, and they never got the help that they needed. But I will.  I promise.  I will put the work in.  I will learn how to cope with painful things and I will never leave you again.  Just tell me that you’ll stay with me.”

 (p. 315) Kindle Edition. 

“I love you.  I love how you are so sweet and innocent and kind to people, but you are such a vixen in the sack.  I love how you look at me.  I love your smile.  I love everything about you.”

(p. 254)Kindle Edition. 

If you want your own copy for your Kindle go here:

Swoon-Worthy Thursday

Swoon-Worthy Directions

• Grab your current/just read book 
• Turn to a swoon worthy moment
• Post it and make sure to provide details of where 
• Make sure to let everyone know what book it is from so they can enjoy it as WELL..

I kept hearing about this book from fellow book bloggers and I was TOLD to read it by a few but for some reason I couldn't bring myself to do it, until the other day. I bought it and then sat down to read it.. 
Now I'm mad at myself for not reading it sooner!! 
I loved this book and my swoon-worthy is brought to you by:

Vain by Fisher Amelie

“You have no idea what you do to me. I’ve felt things for you these past few months that don’t seem healthy. I’ve wanted you so desperately I’m afraid it may not be natural. You consume my thoughts, Sophie,” he confessed, seemingly forgetting I was there. He spoke to the windshield, a sort of haze drifting over him. “You’ve arrested my senses and I can’t seem to get enough of you. That’s what scares me. I’m so deep there’s no getting out for me. You own me, you know?”

 (Kindle Locations 3468-3471)

OH SWOON IAN!!!! 

They could not be a more perfect match!! 

I can't wait to review this amazing book.. 

It'll be coming soon!!

I'll Be Here by Autumn Doughton

So I have to admit that I read this book a while ago but I was so involved in my book reading marathon at the time that I forgot to review it after I was done reading it.. 

Whoops sorry Autumn I swear it wasn't intentional.. 

I picked up this book from Amazon after a recommendation from a fellow book blogger and I was all like: 

"Oh HEY the author's name is Autumn and well, thats the most badass, awesome, beautiful name...EVER so what the hell why not".. 

I wasn't disappointed either.. 

I mean her name is Autumn so I was pretty certain it was going to be amazing..

Here is the description:

For the past two years, Willow James has been building the perfect life--a life that centers around Dustin Rant, her dimpled, sports-car-driving, cologne-wearing boyfriend. Willow and Dustin have lots of plans. Plans for college, prom, tonight actually. So, when the unthinkable happens, and Dustin breaks up with Willow over a plate of cheese fries at a steak house, she is left stunned and heartbroken.

With less than two months until graduation, Willow has to start a new life from scratch. She'll have to revisit old wrongs along the way and make the most important decision of all: who does she want to be? She’s going to have help from her wacky ex-best friend, her bohemian mother, and an old flame that is suddenly and somewhat inconveniently back in her life

My Thoughts:

I really LOVED Willow's character. 

She was smart, sarcastic, funny, and all around NOT annoying which was her best quality. There are many characters out there that I have wanted to escape their brains so I didn't annoy myself and THANKFULLY this book wasn't like that!!

I also loved the little quotes in between each chapter, they were very thought provoking or just ironic.

This book starts off with Willow's boyfriend of two years breaking up with her and Willow being devastated by it. The funniest part about that whole situation (leave it to me to find humor in a character's sadness) was that her mother acted the same way I would have acted if my daughter ever came home and told me she broke up with her boyfriend. 

AND the fact that her mother rather Willow date a semi-badboy instead of a straight lace, football player, it's different, unique and I adored it. 

"Dustin is (or was) a little too “square” for her liking.   Most mothers would be thrilled with a sports-coat-wearing young man, but Julie Beagle is not most moms.   She tolerated Dustin just barely.   My mom admires people that push boundaries and inspire “movement,” whatever the hell that means".

 Then the story moves on to showing how Willow tries to get over her EX. Of course she also finds out the REAL reason that Dustin dumped her and it's breaking her heart all over again. She finds herself friendless, boyfriend-less, and the laughing stock of the whole school.

Although she is living through hell at school, she actually starts to find HERSELF and what SHE wants out of life. She starts making changes and starts mending friendships from the past, sketching like she used too and the real Willow starts shining through.

Then enter Alex.. 

OH Alex is such a hunk that I would love to sink my teeth into him as well.

Willow and Alex pretty much grew up together and she has harbored feelings and intense attraction to him as well, but after their "almost kiss" where he ultimately rejects her, she is embarrassed and never wants anything to do with him again, except from afar. 

They start talking and the chemistry is unmistakeable!

There are some twists and turns and the ending is just as amazing as the beginning. 

But I feel like there needed to be MORE of everything, it was too quick but that did not deter from the book at ALL..

This story is about forgiveness, heartbreak, grief, finding yourself, and best of all, falling in love...

I give this book a 4/5 and I recommend it to everyone..

Quotes from the book:

What can I say?   I have a paper sniffing problem.   Things could be worse.

(Kindle Locations 396-397)

“Yeah, maybe you were a bad friend but I’m a good friend so I understand and I’ll take you back.   Let’s just begin again.”

 (Kindle Locations 1284-1285)

We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled.   The trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out. ~ Ray Bradbury

 (Kindle Locations 2057-2059)

If you want to check this book out for yourself you can go here to buy it for your Kindle:

My BUTTERFLYING reviews of Slammed, Point of Retreat, and This Girl

Just like all of you lovelies that have discovered how AHHHHHmazing Colleen Hoover is, I discovered this gem back in October with SLAMMED, fell even more for Point of Retreat and then was completely BLOWN AWAY over Hopeless, then finally felt like she owned a piece of my heart and soul after completing This Girl... 

I was given the amazing opportunity to read This Girl by Netgalley and loved it so much that I bought a copy of it. 

Even though I am sad that Will and Layken's stories are done I am so glad I can reread them whenever I want! 

SO here is what I thought about all three of these books in this amazing series..

Following the unexpected death of her father, 18-year-old Layken is forced to be the rock for both her mother and younger brother. Outwardly, she appears resilient and tenacious, but inwardly, she's losing hope.

Enter Will Cooper: The attractive, 21-year-old new neighbor with an intriguing passion for slam poetry and a unique sense of humor. Within days of their introduction, Will and Layken form an intense emotional connection, leaving Layken with a renewed sense of hope.

Not long after an intense, heart-stopping first date, they are slammed to the core when a shocking revelation forces their new relationship to a sudden halt. Daily interactions become impossibly painful as they struggle to find a balance between the feelings that pull them together, and the secret that keeps them apart

My Thoughts:

I.LOVED.IT

This was so different from the other books that I was reading. Of course it had the love/romance aspect but it also had SO.MUCH.MORE.

It had characters that were so well-rounded and amazing that there was not a character in the book that I did not love.

Layken was a very stubborn teenager (those really exist?? NO WAY!!) she was still in pain from losing her father and she was forced into a role as the rock, the comforter, the strong one for everyone else while she internally held onto her emotions. She didn't want to move away from the only home she has ever known and start a new school where she would not know anyone. But on the first day of her move she meets her quite delicious neighbor, Will.

Will takes care of his brother while working to finish his degree. He works hard and does not have time for anything other than school, work, and his brother Caulder. When he enters Layken's life, not only is her world turned upside down but so is Will's. 

They are so amazing together but when things happen and they are torn apart before they can even get started, you are left feeling heart broken for both of them. 

Layken has to deal with a lot in this book: grief, forgiveness, heartbreak, and you are feeling every emotion right along with her.

This book was so emotional and I cried buckets, I couldn't put it down and if anyone tried to get my attention while I read, they were liable to get their heads chewed off.. I just loved every stinkin minute of this book, especially the poetry..

OH the poetry was epic and I pretty much highlighted the whole book by the end.

The ending is happy and the readers are left wanting more which brings me into the next one:

Hardships and heartache brought them together…now it will tear them apart.

Layken and Will have proved their love can get them through anything; until someone from Will’s past re-emerges, leaving Layken questioning the very foundation on which their relationship was built. Will is forced to face the ultimate challenge…how to prove his love for a girl who refuses to stop ‘carving pumpkins.’

My Thoughts:

OH EM GEE this book was the epitome of a cluster fuck of emotions. I was happy, sad, heartbroken, horny (seriously the sexual tension was so damn overwhelming!!) and left wanting so much more. 

At first I was not happy about how this book ended, I wanted more and to know more about the characters, this was of course before This Girl was going to come out so thank goodness Colleen Hoover wrote another book to round out their lives and stories, so completely. 

Layken and Will's story picked up where it left off in Slammed and this time the book is in Will's POV, and we finally get to see the inside of his delicious head. 

But this time there is so much more drama between the two characters, and you would think that after all the hardships and heartbreaks from the first book that the second would be smooth sailing.. but of course that wouldn't be much fun..

All the other characters in the first book is present in the second and there are more added to make the book so much more amazing and dramatic that you are damn near tense with anxiety the whole book. 

Layken is still as stubborn as ever and still the rock that holds them all together but there were certain parts that I wanted to shake her and scream!!! 

She started college and with the passing of her mother, she is now the permanent caregiver of her little brother, Kel. 

You see her juggling everything on her own and you fall in love with her character even more. 

Will is just as amazing as he was in the first book. He is so talented with his words that you fall in love with him over and over again. He decided to not work but only focus on getting his masters degree when his evil little ex whore girlfriend shows up completely throwing everything out of sync. 

Ahh but the drama does not stop there folks, there is also something that happens in the middle of the book that leaves you holding your breath until almost the very end. You are left on the edge of your seat, trying to keep yourself from peeking at the end of the book to see what happens so your nerves can have a break from being tense and sad. 

But waiting is totally worth it and the book ends on a special occasion that leads readers to the last and final book:

Layken and Will’s love has managed to withstand the toughest of circumstances and the young lovers, now married, are beginning to feel safe and secure in their union. As much as Layken relishes their new life together, she finds herself wanting to know everything there is to know about her husband, even though Will makes it clear he prefers to keep the painful memories of the past where they belong. Still, he can’t resist his wife’s pleas and so he begins to untangle his side of the story, revealing for the first time his most intimate feelings and thoughts, retelling both the good and bad moments, and sharing a few shocking confessions of his own from the time when they first met.

In This Girl, Will tells the story of their complicated relationship from hispoint of view. Their future rests on how well they deal with the past in this final installment of the beloved Slammed series

My  Thoughts:

*SwOoOOooN*

I always wondered how Will felt during Slammed because he was so hot/cold towards Layken that I never could understand it. But now gaaaahhh I <3 him even more!! 

I got to relive one of my favorite books through the other character's eyes and it was swoon-worthingly amazing!! 

This book also brought the whole series full-circle and you get an awesome Epilogue that rounds off the characters, making it a wonderful goodbye to Layken and Will.

In this book Will and Layken are married and enjoying all their extracurricular activities in  their hotel room when Layken suddenly wants to know all about what Will thought about the first time they met and all the way until he graduated college. 

His POV is so very swoon-worthy and the book is not the EXACT same as it was in Slammed. There are new elements thrown in and even more amazing poetry, by the always sexy, Will. 

Oh his way with words could make any girls panties drop. 

I was afraid that it had been so long since I read Slammed that I would not remember anything but I am glad it had been a while since I read it because I got to experience every emotion like it was my first time.

I laughed, cried, got frustrated, and experienced every other emotion that you can imagine. 

Layken is still the same stubborn, sweet, person and Will is still the same swoon-worthy, level headed person that they were in the other two books. 

There is not much I can say about this book other than how amazing it was because it was similar to Slammed BUT the new information that you get when you read this one makes this book that much better.. 

 I really can't express enough how much I LOVED this series!! It was amazing, steamy, frustrating, heartbreaking, and every other emotion you can imagine. 

You fall in love with characters and pretend they are living, breathing people (ok maybe that was just me but still). You laugh and cry with them and I am sad to see them go but happy that I got to be apart of their lives.  

Colleen Hoover is an amazing writer and I can't believe that she is a writer, mother, and a ninja.. she must secretly have a twin because I can't imagine all the crime fighting, ass kicking, and booger wiping she does on a daily basis and then produce such heart warming stories that are left in your mind MONTHS after reading them. True talent right there!.

AND I also heard she was actually pretty sweet and kind..

 GAAHH GIVE this woman a medal ;)!!

I give the series a 5/5  and I can't wait to read more from Colleen Hoover!!

Here are some Snippets from each book:

“God Layken. How do you do it? she says. She blows her nose and grabs another tissue out of the box. How do I do what? I sniff as I continue to wipe the tears from my eyes. How do you not fall in love with him? The tears begin flowing just as quickly as they had ceased. I grab yet another tissue. I don't not fall in love with him. I don't not fall in love with him a lot!” 

-Slammed-

“Never judge others. You both know good and well how unexpected events can change who a person is. Always keep that in mind. You never know what someone else is experiencing within their own life.” 

-Slammed-

“I got schooled this year
by
a
boy.
A boy that I'm seriously, deeply, madly, incredibly, and undeniably inlove with.
And he taught me the most important thing of all...
To put the emphasis
On life .” 

-Slammed-

And no, I don't need days , or weeks , or months to think about why I love you.
It's an easy answer for me.
I love you because of you .
Because of
every 
single 
thing 
about you .” 

-Point of Retreat-

“I know how you like to be asked and not told. But I'm not asking you to marry me...I'm telling you to marry me, Lake.. because I can't live without you.” 

-Point of Retreat-

“If I were a carpenter, I would build you a window to my soul. But I would leave that window shut and locked, so that every time you tried to look through it all you would see is your own reflection. You would see that my soul is a reflection of you.”

-Point of Retreat-

"Layken Cooper, I love you. I've loved you since the second I laid eyes on you and I haven't stopped loving you for a second since"

-This Girl-

"If you throw this ugly shirt away, I'm divorcing you."..."Finally! You love my ugly shirt"

-This Girl-

"My sweet is that me and Kel are finally brothers. My suck is that I now know what Will and Layken did during their honeymoon."

-This Girl-

If you want to purchase them on Amazon here are the links:

Swoon-Worthy Thursday

So I have to say that I am eating my words...

The Dark Light bothered me for some reason I could not understand but I kept on reading, finished the book and then started on Dark Prince... 

Gahhhh I did a 180 about half way into the book and I. Couldn't. Put. It. Down. I read until the wee hours of the morning and then..then I couldn't stop thinking about it and what the next book is going to be like..... 

So my sleep deprivation is so totally worth it but I' going to need Mrs. Jennings to hurry it up with the third book and I mean I needed it like yesterday!! ;) 

Well, anyway since I just finished The Dark Prince I wanted to put a swoon-worthy moment from this book on the blog.. 

I literally have about 45highlights and that is truly a new record for me!! 

So here ya guys go... 

Swoon-Worthy Directions

• Grab your current/just read book 
• Turn to a swoon worthy moment
• Post it and make sure to provide details of where 
• Make sure to let everyone know what book it is from so they can enjoy it as WELL..

“But you, my love, hold the most powerful magic that this world has ever seen. And I am in love with you. You could easily decimate me by simply taking your love away.”

(pg. 42 Kindle Edition)

oh Dorian you swoon my panties right off with your magical sexual skills and words that speak to the heart!! But you really need to stop calling Gabriella little girl because it really creeps me out!!! haha 

TeASeR TuEsDaY..

Here is how this works:

• Grab your current read. 
• Open to a random page. 
• Share two “teaser” sentences from somewhere on that page, post the page number or location.
• Be careful not to include any spoilers so you do not ruin the book for others. 
• Make sure to add the title of the book and the author so others can enjoy the book as welll...
• Remember it is meant to TEASE not PLEASE

Soo I just finished this book this morning and I am not really sure how I feel about it yet.. 

I really loved the cover and that is the first thing that got my attention 

BUT I haven't put my finger on why I cannot stay connected with the main character, I hope it gets better in the second book.. 

We shall see.. 

Here is my TEASER from 

Dark Light by S.L. Jennings:

“Girl, tell me about it. I had no idea he was a pipe layer on the side. Dude had me speaking Spanish by the end of the night!”

(Kindle Locations 1574-1575)

hahaha that part had me giggling like a school girl 

Giveaway!!

Do you want to win a SIGNED copy of Sweet Thing by Renee Carlino????? 

This book is one of my favorite reads of 2013, so far.. 

If you haven't read it yet then here is your opportunity to read it or if you have and LOVED it as much as I did then here is YOUR chance to win it!! 

I am so JEALOUS for whoever wins this amazing prize!!

You have one week to enter: 

All you have to do is LIKE me on Facebook, Follow me on Twitter, and/or tweet about the giveaway and you are entered to win.. 

It is THAT simple!! 

Trust me guys you will want this book, especially when it hits ultra stardom and you can say that YOU read and OWNED a signed copy of it before anyone else ;)...

Here is the information about this book and you can also click HERE to see my review...

Mia Kelly is a twenty-five-year-old walking Gap ad who thinks she has life figured out when her father’s sudden death uproots her from slow-paced Ann Arbor to New York City’s bustling East Village. There she discovers her father’s spirit for life and the legacy he left behind with the help of an old café, a few eccentric friends, and one charming musician.

Will Ryan is good-looking, poetic, spontaneous, and on the brink of fame when he meets Mia, his new landlord, muse, and personal heartbreaker.

A story of self-discovery and friendship, Sweet Thing shines light on the power of loving and letting go.

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